In Parkland, Florida, students returned to Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School on Sunday afternoon for the first time since February 14, when a 19-year-old white former student named Nikolas Cruz walked into the school and opened fire with an AR-15 semiautomatic rifle, killing 17 people. Outside the school, students talked about what it felt like to return to the scene of the killing.

Mikayla Stravitz: “I’m kind of scared what it’s going to be like going back and not seeing Aaron Feis at the front gate, like his big smile, waving, and then our little stupid conversations, which they were—I miss him. And then, you know, him dying a hero, saving six kids and staying on top of them, I’m happy he did that. It’s not going to be the same, not in the mornings, not when I leave, not seeing his face, not seeing him on the golf cart. It’s going to be different.”