A new investigation by The Guardian reveals self-induced abortions may be on the rise in the United States, as women struggle to access abortion services amid a wave of anti-abortion restrictions imposed in recent years. Since 2008, online searches for information on how to induce one’s own abortion nearly doubled across the United States. Another study suggests more than 4 percent of women in Texas—that’s at least 100,000 women—have tried to self-induce their own abortion. The Guardian investigation also draws on emails sent by women in the United States to the Dutch organization Women on Web, which provides abortion drugs in countries where the procedure is banned outright. Despite abortion being legal in the U.S., the group received hundreds of emails from women across the U.S. last year alone. One woman in Missouri wrote that she had gone to the state’s only abortion clinic, “but the protestors shamed me into going back. I’m not a citizen and its a little scary coz I feel very lonely.” Many wrote they could not afford an abortion. Another woman wrote, “I cry and pray every night that the Lord take this child from me somehow.”